Bittersweat

My kids are home, but the vet visit was sad. We kept missing each other, so Dottie's test results remained a mystery until now. They confirmed what I already knew-early congestive heart failure and failing kidneys. So, it's KD and a water pill for her.

I knew it-I know the signs from being a vet tech and a dog person, but I really didn't WANT to know it. My girl will get the best care possible until the end, and if I have to, I will help her along. But I don't want to KNOW, even though I already knew.

The thing is, I am glad that I spent the money to have the tests run. One, I can extend her time left by treating what I can. And, in the end, I won't have to wonder if I did all I could.

End of life issues are tough with humans, dogs, everything. But, if we love them, we do not look away.

Dottie's little X-rays were amazing-such a tiny little thing, and enlarged, her heart was still a very small organ. A minature heart that has touched the lives of many. I just want it to keep beating forever.

Steve Irwin is talking (on a rerun of course) about death, one door shutting and another door opening. I wonder if he'd still say the same thing now? Humans leave things behind like TV interviews and books. What do dogs leave, besides the lives they touch?

My dog is going to die. Well, they all are, but her time is likely sooner rather than later. It's a moment I've dreaded for several years now, life without Dottie. But, I would still not trade the time we've had for any grief that may come.